After a mid-week de-stressing meltdown (something I'm finding myself having more & more of as I grow deeper into my 30's), the conversation that I was having with dear hubby shifted gears and the focus became "flaws." He enlightened me to the fact that "everyone has flaws." They do? Really? I thought I knew some folks that seemingly embody perfection. Since dear hubby says nobody is perfect and that these folks have flaws (albeit not like mine), I'm going to remember that the next time their perfection stuns my brain and leaves my head feeling weary. Afterall, dear hubby is smart, and I trust his judgement more than mine most days. He's always been my ground wire.
If you were lucky enough to grow up in a household where shows like Alice (& later Mel's Diner) and The Carol Burnett Show regularly graced your home's one & only TV screen with a channel dial & no remote, then you just may have developed a good sarcastic sense of humor like I did. I remember having TV dinner nights with my metal E.T. or Smurfs TV tray plopped down a body's length from the TV, and I remember laughing hysterically while watching these shows. Today my kids occasionally use those trays, and I have the warm fuzzies every time I see this. My childhood totally comes back to me as they spring open the rusty legs on the trays & excitedly hover over their grub - I can almost smell my family's old house & hear that old TV's channel dial clicking...
While watching these shows as a kid, I was indeed laughing along with my Mom & older siblings that probably fully grasped the themes of said shows better than I did, but I was honestly overtaken by a guttural laugh every time Flo would utter those magic words and tell the man of the hour to well, "kiss [her] grits." And I recall trying to imitate Carol Burnett when she would drive home a point by giving that look which brilliantly conveyed shock, anger, & annoyance with her eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets. It was the best.
One Halloween dear hubby dressed like Gone with the Wind's Rhett Butler while I tried to pay homage to Carol Burnett & dressed up like her version of Scarlett O'Hara, complete with a curtain rod for my dress. Sadly only a handful of people at the party got it. They were obviously deprived of nearly the best sketch comedy ever written on The Carol Burnett show.
Flo and nearly all of the characters that Carol Burnett played on her show were written with flaws, because let's face it -- other people's flaws are sometimes laughable. However those women (the actresses) were proudly committed to conveying their characters' flaws. From this point forward, I am committing myself to accepting my character flaws. I've always tried to be an open book, so why not just move on?! I should feel like I can just be me - whereever I go.
As a stay-at home-mom with too much time for introspection and reflection, I do realize that this whole blogging thing is semi-pathetic. I guess I am trying to climb the self actualization pyramid as I pour a few ounces of who I truly am into this blog in hopes that if just one other person can relate & gets it, then I'll have been helpful. I've debated taking it down. I've debated why I'm posting things. I've had remorse after posting things, especially curmudgeonly things, but I've told myself that I have to be me and this is what I am reduced to at the moment.
As a stay-at home-mom with too much time for introspection and reflection, I do realize that this whole blogging thing is semi-pathetic. I guess I am trying to climb the self actualization pyramid as I pour a few ounces of who I truly am into this blog in hopes that if just one other person can relate & gets it, then I'll have been helpful. I've debated taking it down. I've debated why I'm posting things. I've had remorse after posting things, especially curmudgeonly things, but I've told myself that I have to be me and this is what I am reduced to at the moment.
If you take issue with the fact that I am occassionally overly sensitive, that I try too hard to be too kind, that I have a charitible heart, & that I pretend to be seasoned at domestic things & do a sad job of emulating Martha Stewart, then here's a Carol Burnett glare for you. If you don't like that I enjoy publicly embarassing friends by being a goofball, am sporadically obnoxious, will still do a cart wheel with two hands or one, pretend I am still limber & think I can do a high leg kick, am randomly outspoken, refuse to join religious or political debates, will not pretend to be a gym rat, carry a spare tire, & refuse to give up fatty foods, am known to enjoy one too many glasses of liquid bread & make some mean macaroni, then you can kiss my cheese grits.
Thank you, Flo & Carol (& dear hubby), for teaching me to lift my chin & to accept who I am. Thank you, Mom, for allowing me to watch those shows as a kid with you. Thank you, Edie Brickell for singing, "What I am is what I am. Are you what you are - or what?" Now, I've put a good song in your head...sing it loud!
Other women, be encouraged, & be yourself -- your best self. If you don't know who that is, then take time to figure it out. I'm still doing that...Men, give thanks that your woman hasn't told you to "kiss [her] grits" for good, and be honest, yet encouraging, whenever possible. If your woman asks you if her dress makes her butt look big, then man up, be her friend, and politely find the right words to tell her to change her dress. We all only live once, so be real, be you and take time to laugh at those who are seemingly perfect. No one is.
Other women, be encouraged, & be yourself -- your best self. If you don't know who that is, then take time to figure it out. I'm still doing that...Men, give thanks that your woman hasn't told you to "kiss [her] grits" for good, and be honest, yet encouraging, whenever possible. If your woman asks you if her dress makes her butt look big, then man up, be her friend, and politely find the right words to tell her to change her dress. We all only live once, so be real, be you and take time to laugh at those who are seemingly perfect. No one is.
In the words of the Serenity Prayer commonly embraced by twelve-step programs everywhere:
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference."
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference."
And...for the record, I like my grits salted, buttered, & of course, "covered."
**For those not privy to what "covered" means:
(1) That's unacceptable.
(2) It's the best way to eat most foods.
(3) Because I'm nice I'll clue you in -- "covered" is Waffle House slang for "with cheese."
